The Space Between Us Read online

  “Charlie, his flight might have been delayed. Or maybe, his parents want to spend an evening with him. After all, they haven't seen him all summer either.”

  “Dad, I'm just drawing. If he calls, he calls,” I said as I shrugged my shoulders. It was the least convincing thing I'd ever said, but my dad did a great job of nodding and walking to the other room. The phone suddenly rang and I jumped.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, Charlie. Wanna go to the mall?” I rolled my eyes so hard I was sure I was going to lose one in the back of my skull.

  “No, Reeve. I don't want to go to the mall. Go ahead without me.”

  “What are you doing?”

  “Nothing, just drawing.”

  “Well then, come with me. I need someone to talk to while I guy-watch in the food court.”

  “No thanks. I'm in the middle of this drawing and I really want to finish.”

  “Oh fine. If you change your mind, I'll be at the food court.”

  “Ok,” I said, knowing I wasn't going to change my mind. “Have fun.” I hung up the phone and returned to my pad of paper that had the worst drawing I had done since grade school. I was distracted and nothing was flowing from me. It was just a big jumbled mess of lines. The phone rang again and I rolled my eyes.

  “I haven't changed my mind. I don't want to go anywhere,” I said, exasperated.

  “Oh, that's too bad,” I heard a voice say on the other side that definitely wasn't Reeve. “I was hoping I could see you for a little while tonight.” My darned heart was doing that beat-so-fast-it-might-pop-out thing again.

  “Asher?”

  “Yeah, it's me. Were you expecting your other best friend to return from a summer away today?”

  “No,” I said. His voice sounded different - deeper. Maybe it's just the phone. He'll probably sound the same in person. “I just wasn't sure if you were going to spend the evening with your parents or not. I'm sure they've missed you.”

  “Yeah, but I can squeeze you in,” he said, making me smile. “Meet me outside?”

  “Now?”

  “Do you want to wait any longer?”

  I shook my head.

  “Charlie?”

  “No!” I almost shouted once I realized he couldn't hear me shaking my head. He laughed.

  “Ok, I'll meet you out there.”

  I tried not to run to the door to put on my shoes, but I was definitely walking fast. My dad saw me dashing down the hallway.

  “Did he call?” He shouted from his office.

  “Yup!” I shouted back.

  “Be home for dinner!”

  “Ok!”

  I reached the door and stopped at the mirror hanging in the entry way. I studied my face, making sure, for a reason new to me, that I looked ok. What did 'ok' look like? Was my hair crazy? No. Did I have anything on my face? No. I guess this was as good as it was going to get. I shook my head at myself; I never cared before what I looked like when I saw Asher.

  I opened the door to the warm summer air. The sun was beginning to set, but still pretty high. Orange and red streaks were ribbons in the sky. I had another hour or so before dinner. I turned right at the sidewalk and absolutely could not help the enormous smile that spread across my face as I saw him walking towards me. I also couldn't help it when my feet started moving faster and faster until I was running towards him. He was running towards me as well and when we finally made it to each other, I jumped up into his arms and he swung me around. We spun for what seemed like hours. His nose was pressed into my hair and my face was snuggled into the crook of his neck. I didn't remember him ever smelling good, but he did. He smelled different.

  When he finally put me down, we each spent a few moments unabashedly looking each other over. I saw him eyeing me, but didn't care because I was eyeing him. He was huge. He was big. He was perfect.

  “You grew,” were the first words out of my mouth.

  “You didn't,” he responded. He was right. I hadn’t grown one smidge over the summer – in height anyway.

  “No, seriously. You must be at least a foot taller than you were when you left.” I went to stand next to him to gauge how much taller he'd gotten. I remembered before he left when we walked side-by-side if I looked over at him I was looking at his shoulder. Now I turned my head and I was looking at his chest. Even his chest looked bigger. “What did they feed you on that farm?” He laughed.

  “You look different too, but you're still so small,” he said. I shrugged.

  “It's a curse.”

  “No, it's ok. I like you small. You're like those cartoons we use to watch back in fifth grade. What was it called?”

  “We watched a lot of cartoons, Asher.”

  “It was on Nickelodeon and it was about those little people who lived in the forest.” I scrunched up my eyebrows, thinking hard.

  “You mean The Littl' Bits?”

  “Yeah! That's them. They were tiny too, just like you. You're my little bit.”

  I felt the blood immediately rush to my face as I started blushing. I looked down at the ground to try and hide the crimson shade of my cheeks and the ridiculous smile I wore.

  “Do you have some time? Can we go for a walk?”

  “Yeah, I have to be back for dinner, so I've got about an hour.” We started walking, with no real destination, and ended up back at our elementary school. We both took seats on a swing and just sat and talked. He told me about his summer on the farm and how his grandpa taught him how to drive on his old truck. He told me about how they took some cows “out to pasture”, whatever that meant, and that they had to sleep in a tent for a few nights. He heard coyotes howling close to this tent and was really scared, but too afraid to say anything to his grandpa because he wanted to seem like a grown up. I told him I would have peed my pants if I heard a coyote outside my tent. He laughed.

  “So, Bit,” he said with a smile. I shook my head at his new nickname for me, pretending to be annoyed by it. “Did you and Reeve meet any cute boys at the mall?” I looked up at him when he asked the question, but his gaze was on the ground, his feet digging small holes in the bark dust. I shrugged my shoulders.

  “Not really. Whenever Reeve would engage any of them in conversation I would just nod at them and smile. It was really boring.”

  “Good.” He said. I couldn't look him in the eye.

  “Did you meet any cute girls on the farm?”

  “Well,” he started. “There was this one girl. She was just there for the summer too. I spent a lot of time with her and we became really good friends.”

  “Oh,” was all I could say as my heart fell all the way into my shoes.

  “She had really pretty brown hair and a big black spot over her left eye.” I looked up at him curiously. “Her name was Cupcake,” he said, smiling again. I smacked him, an involuntary movement that I had no idea was occurring until it was over. “She was my horse,” he said through the laughter that trilled out of him. I was too angry at him for his joke to notice how beautiful his laugh was, almost.

  “Your horse?”

  “Yup, she was pretty great. Best friend a guy could have on a farm.”

  “So you didn't meet any cute human girls?” This time he shrugged.

  “There were a few girls who came around, mostly the daughters of the other farmhands. They weren't anything special. Besides, any time they tried to talk to me, somehow the conversation always came back to my best friend who was back home.” I didn't try to hide my smile that time. I wore it proudly.

  “Come on, Asher. It's time to go home.”

  Chapter Three

  It was the first day of high school. Reeve and I stood at our very first locker which we were sharing. Something about having a locker was so cool. I was nervous about my first day, but I felt a little better because Reeve was so excited and confident.

  At this point in our development, Reeve and I were pretty opposite. Her boobs came in during eighth grade and she was very proud of them. Her boobs got bigger,
her waist got smaller, legs longer, and skin tanner. It was hard not to notice her or notice all the boys noticing her. Sometimes it was a little intimidating being next to her walking down the halls, but most of the time I didn't mind because it meant no one was looking at me. She wore clothes that accentuated her newly formed body and she liked that other people admired what she worked so hard to show off.

  “Hey, Bit,” I heard Asher's voice behind me. I turned around and rolled my eyes at him.

  “Is this nickname going to stick?” I asked, trying to sound exasperated.

  “He gave you a nickname? That's cute,” Reeve commented, turning back to the mirror that was magnetically stuck to the inside of our locker as she finished putting on some lipstick.

  I began to blush, trying to think of something to say when Asher saved me.

  “Name the last time you didn't think something was 'cute',” he said, using his fingers to make air quotation marks.

  “What? It's sweet the way you treat Charlie. People who don't know you probably think you have a massive crush on her, but I know better. She just totally has a big brother idolization of you and you have some weird need to be her bodyguard. You're going to have to get over that, Asher,” Reeve said, pointing at him. “This year boys are going to start wanting to ask Charlie out, and they won’t have the chance if you're always giving them those death stares and maintaining a three-foot bubble around her.”

  “He doesn't do that,” I scoffed.

  “Uh, yes he does. He has ever since seventh grade when Brady Collins told Asher he had a crush on you.”

  “Brady Collins had a crush on me?”

  “No,” Asher answered quickly.

  “No?” Reeve challenged.

  “No. He said he thought you were cute, not that he had a crush on you.”

  “And what is the difference?” Reeve asked with a smirk.

  “Wait, he thought I was cute?”

  “If he thought you were cute in seventh grade, he's gonna go crazy for you this year, Charlie.” Asher groaned and ran his hand through his hair. That was something new I'd never seen him do before.

  “What did you say to him, Asher?” I asked.

  “Nothing. I just told him that you didn't date, that your dad probably wouldn't let you.”

  The idea that Asher had chased Brady off made me feel weirdly happy, but I knew I didn't want him to know that.

  “You were probably right,” I admitted. I wasn’t even sure my dad would let me date now in ninth grade. Reeve put her bag in the locker and grabbed a notebook then slammed the locker door.

  “All I'm saying is that Asher's got his work cut out for him this year if he thinks he's going to continue this whole Protecting Charlie's Innocence thing he's been doing for so long.”

  “I'm not protecting her innocence,” he grumbled.

  “Wow, look who filled out this summer! Charlie, my backseat's got your name all over it.” The offensive words came from a guy we’d gone to school with before, but hadn’t seen in a few years because he was older than us. The words hadn't even made it all the way out of his mouth before Asher pushed him up against the wall of lockers. His forearm pressed into the boy’s neck, and I heard Asher growling some words at him, but I couldn't make them out. The boy against the lockers held his hand up as if surrendering, and after a few moments Asher let him go. I saw his shoulders moving up and down rapidly, and heard his breaths whooshing in and out of his lungs quickly.

  I was frozen where I stood. I had never seen Asher be even remotely violent. I had no idea what I should do. Asher finally turned around to look at me, but I didn't recognize the look in his eyes; it was nothing I had ever seen from him. He held my gaze for a moment, then turned and walked the opposite direction. It was all I could do to watch him walk away. I wanted to go after him, but I didn't know what to say, and I, honestly, was a little bit scared of him at the moment.

  “What was that?” I whispered, more to myself than anyone else.

  “That, my friend, was Asher claiming his territory,” Reeve replied.

  “What territory?”

  “You.”

  “He doesn't think of me as territory.”

  “Well, that guy's throat begs to differ,” she said motioning towards the guy still trying to recover from Asher's outburst. Something in my gut tried to tell me that this was huge. Something changed in the last five minutes, something that was going to alter our friendship. I could feel it.

  “Come on. Let's find our classes.”

  I didn't see Asher for the rest of the school day. I looked for him every time I turned a corner, every time I walked down the hallway. During lunch I thought for sure I would see him walk through the doors to the cafeteria, but he never showed up. This was not how our first day of high school was supposed to go. I was sad he wasn't around for me to talk to, to see how his day was going, but even more than that, I was worried about him.

  By the end of the day I was frazzled and anxious. Reeve stayed after for an orientation, so I went to leave and started the walk home. Very few times in the last four years had I walked home from school alone. Unless he was sick, Asher always walked with me. His absence from the walk felt deeper than it should have. Him not being there to walk me home felt like I had lost him in another way completely. I pushed open the heavy metal door that led to the side of the building that pointed towards my house.

  My heart skipped a beat when I saw Asher standing at the edge of the school property, waiting for me. I tried to keep my pace steady and not rush to him, but I couldn't help it. When I finally made it to him my arms moved without my permission and wrapped around his waist and I pressed my cheek against his chest. We never really hugged all that much, and when we did it was simple, friendly, and over quickly. This was different.

  When his arms came around my shoulders and pulled me into him, I breathed a sigh of relief. A peace and a calm that I had been seeking all day in his absence flooded my system. I took a few steadying breaths and couldn't help but notice that he smelled amazing. I might have taken a few extra breaths just to make sure I got my fill of his new and enticing scent.

  “I was worried about you,” I mumbled into his chest. I felt him pull away, but not far enough that he had to let go of me. I looked up at him.

  “You're not mad at me?” I didn't understand why he thought I would be angry and I took a step back in confusion.

  “Why would I be mad at you?”

  “Cause I totally lost my cool on that guy.” He sounded so angry with himself and I just wanted to make him feel better.

  “He was a jerk.” He looked down at his feet now, hands in his pockets. “What he said wasn't cool and I'm glad someone was there to stick up for me.”

  “I saw your face. When I turned around, I saw it. You were scared of me.”

  What was I supposed to say to that? Was I scared? Yes, a little. But not really of him. I was afraid of the situation, that it was going to get out of hand, that perhaps Asher was going to get hurt.

  “I wasn't afraid of you. I was caught off guard is all.” His eyes snapped up to mine, the grey in them was darker, alluding to his distress.

  “I'd never hurt you, Charlie. Not ever. Not physically, not emotionally, not in any way.”

  “Asher, stop. I know that.”

  “I never want to see you look at me like that again.”

  “What happened, anyway?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean, he said something stupid and you kind of just lost your mind. What happened?” He shook his head slightly then shrugged his shoulders.

  “I heard what he said and, I don't know, something inside of me snapped. The idea that he was thinking about you like that. The image of what he said made a picture in my head. I just couldn't take it. Before I knew what was happening, I had him up against the wall.”

  “What did you say to him?” He looked at me and I saw a moment of panic in his eyes, but it was gone in an instant.

  “I didn
't say anything to him.” I cocked my head to the side and gave him a glare.

  “I heard you say something to him, Asher. What did you say?”

  “Honestly, if I said something, I don't remember. Maybe you just heard the sound of my arms crushing his throat.” He sounded disgusted with himself. I felt terrible for him, but I also felt a tiny bit responsible. Obviously I can't control what some random guy says about me, but I couldn't help the feeling it gave me when I thought about the fact that all this happened because Asher was trying to protect me.

  “Well, I can guarantee you he won’t be talking to me for the foreseeable future.”

  “Good.” He said harshly.

  “Where were you all day?”

  “I left and went home. I was too angry at first to be there, then I just decided to scrap the whole day and start over tomorrow.”

  “You didn't have to come back for me,” I said, trying to hide the fact that I secretly loved that he was here to walk me home. He gave me one of the most beautiful smiles I'd ever seen.

  “I'll always come back for you, Bit.”

  Chapter Four

  It had been a few months since school started and things between Asher and I were back to normal – almost. There weren't many more uncomfortable situations between us. No more instances of touching longer than usual or breathing him in just to keep his scent within me. Guys at school were keeping their distance, although it was hard to tell if it was just because of Asher's outburst the first day of school, there still being some residual fear that if any of them spoke to me he might go all caveman on them again, or if they had just gone back to not noticing me like any other day. Either way, I didn't mind. It didn't seem like my dad did either.

  “Charlie Bear, how are the boys treating you at school?” He asked me one night over dinner. I finished chewing the bite I had just taken while shrugging my shoulders.

  “They don't really pay me any attention,” I said while still looking down at my plate. I didn't want to talk to my dad about boys.

  He raised his eyebrows at me. “I don't believe that for a moment,” he scoffed.

  “It's true. One boy said something terrible to me the very first day and Asher nearly killed him.” The fork that had been on its way to my father's mouth was stopped mid-air, and his jaw hung open. After a second or two he closed his mouth and put his fork back down.